I’ve been thinking a lot about body positivity lately and have Ben enjoying following amazing women on various social media platforms. But I still get really self conscious about my own body and appearance. I’ve also been putting my own mind to test recently as I was a bridesmaid at my best friends wedding. I always really wanted to do it for her and had fun arranging the hen do, but the bit that always. Oncerned me was finding the dress and then being comfortable in it all day.
I’m not one for wearing dresses at all. I just never feel comfortable in them. I tried on quite a few dresses when searching for my bridesmaid dress. I chose the one below as I liked the shape I saw reflected back in the mirror. I was also comfortable as it did not restrict my movement at all and I could easily sit down. However I still felt very self conscious the whole time I was in it. It took a few drinks for me to enjoy dancing with my friends.
It wasn’t until after that I realised I didn’t get many photos of myself during the day. The one above and the one below were just as we finished getting ready. I prefer the photo above as I feel very forced posing in the one below. I would like to work on being able to look at photos of myself and not automatically look for the flaws I see. I want to look at them and see the happiness and other emotions and remember the moment. A work in progress for sure.
I did buy myself some shapewear to wear under the dress and actually I found it really good. I didn’t go for a tight, suck it all in thing, but rather something that slight smoothed the lines and had shorts as I hate tights! I didn’t buy the shapewear for anyone but myself. I wanted it to let me forget my flaws for the day and feel better about being in photos. I definitely noticed a difference as I didn’t feel I was holding everything in all day. I found I relaxed more than I would normally in a dress. It allowed me to enjoy myself freely.
I loved being my friends bridesmaid. It was an honour and I am so happy for her and her husband.
But I am the last single girl in the group. Another friend from school just got engaged and it’s stirred up feelings. This has made me feel a bit odd recently and I’ve been talking about it to my therapist. It’s not that I’m lonely or looking for a relationship. At some times I really think I don’t want one. I love being independent and selfish and wonder how I would fit in being in a relationship. I’m not sure how I’m feeling at the moment and just know it’s something I need to explore. I truly believe you don’t need to be in a relationship to be whole…
As well as cooking and makeup I’m looking at my style this year. I really want to be comfortable in the clothes I wear and have them show off my personality more than they currently do.
Clothes have always been a bit of a mystery to me. I’ve never been a girl who loves clothes shopping and tend to go out a couple of times a year and buy everything I need in one go. I’ve found I end up with a mis-mash of clothes that recently I’ve been struggling to make go together and that I feel comfortable in. I think weight has always been part of my non-love of clothes and continues to influence the way I dress myself. It’s definitely the area of my life I let other peoples opinions overrule my own thoughts and that is something I want to work on changing.
I’m going to start by looking at what I wear to work. I saw this article ages ago and it has been stuck in my mind ever since.
I loved this so much. It resonated with me at my core. I think this is because for so long I have tried to take an interest in fashion, but it is not natural to me. I would much prefer to keep it simple yet stylish. I want to spend my time thinking about and doing the things that are really important to me, rather than worry about the things that aren’t high on my priority list.
So I am creating my own work uniform – black trousers, black t-shirt top, and colourful cardigan with shoes or boots (depending on the weather. For me this keeps things simple, while letting my personality come out through my colourful cardigans.
Outside of work I am also looking to make sure my personality comes through. A lot of the time I am in jeans and tops or sports clothes for swimming. I am going to streamline things a bit more and sort out my cupboard and focus on great fitting jeans and tops. I’ll also make sure I have some smarter pieces or things can be dressed up for those occasional nights out. I will also have some really smart things for really special events like weddings!
I feel really confident about this switch in focus on this area of my life. I am going to go with my gut and wear what feels good to me and shut out the haters. I want to be body positive and this for me means I wear what I want to wear and support what others want to wear too. I don’t think I’ll ever be so confident I will show lots of skin, but I want to be as confident as I am happy to be in everything I wear. This will be a learning and growing process and will probably change as I move through my thirties and I’m looking forward to that, but for now I’m all about simplicity and feeling great!
There are two areas I do want to start cultivating fun pieces to add some quirkiness to my look. This is through fandom t-shirts and jewelry! I’ve already got my eye on these things!
These cat face earrings from Black Heart Creatives (just need to get my ears re-pierced)
This necklace with my favourite quote inside (not pictured) from The Locket Library
This I admit is a totally random purchase for November, but a new outlet store opened in my town and I couldn’t resist. I chose my christmas present from my parents but also wanted to buy something for myself so I treated myself to these sunglasses!
The photos are great but they are a purple/brown colour.
I just loved how they looked on (again not the best photo) and they cover the whole of my eyes so will be great for wearing driving as well as walking around.
I have a few Fossil things as they are one of my favourite brands. I love the slogan on the glasses – Love Live Vintage.
This is me trying expand my wardrobe and accessories beyond my normal choices. A lot my stuff is walking or work based so I am trying to try new things and have a new work wardrobe post planned where I hope to work out some different outfits I can put together using some new purchases and some stuff I already have 🙂
I read a few blogs about fashion. Already Pretty, Skinny Emmie and Becoming the Odd Duck are fantastic and I have started to think a bit more about fashion and how I dress in recent weeks.
I never really got into clothes like my friends. In fact when I was at my biggest I lived in baggy sports clothes as I felt comfortable in them and they fitted.
Even though I’m not at my goal weight I have started to want to buy nice clothes and be a bit more interested in fashion.
I like simplicity and would be happy to live in jeans and t-shirts. But I would also like to wear nice things to work or just out shopping.
I would love to overhaul my entire wardrobe, but that would be expensive. So I am instead planning on buying a new outfit or part of an outfit every month. I am going to take what I learn and like from the blog I read and find something similar to buy. This will involve taking a day or half a day every month to go to the shops with the sole purpose of buying clothes. I will probably do this alone to begin with (I’m not comfortable shopping for clothes with friends) and then over time go with other people.
This month I have bought :
- An Owl Jumper from Next, which is supposed to be worn baggy, but when I tried it on it didn’t look right baggy so I went for a smaller size so it is more fitted, but not tight.
This will fit with my current wardrobe, but do move towards where I want to go with my style. A relaxed and funky kind of style that I can dress up or down. I plan on buying items that move towards the style I want gradually. I am not confident enough to change style all at once, but I want to add confidence to my fashion choices.
I like brands that give me confidence and Fat Face is one of those as their motto is “Life is out there…” and this is how I want to live and express myself through fashion.