Out of Sync

Things haven’t been going to plan.

The plan I set last year.

The plan for the goal that isn’t resonating with me anymore.

When things aren’t aligning with your values everything feels like a struggle. Feels like punishment.

I’ve been absent from the blog because I don’t know what to say. I set up 2015 to be the year I completed a 70.3 triathlon. But I’m not feeling it anymore. I don’t know if I ever felt it really. I signed up because everyone else was – bad reason!

Things just feel out of sync.

Until I think about swimming. There I know I want to swim a 5k and a 10k event. I feel excited thinking about those goals. I want to put the effort in there. I want to spend the summer at the lake.

I am taking some time to figure things out. If I hadn’t signed up for the triathlon already I wouldn’t sign up now. I need to decide if I want to do this. I know I do deep down, or I will at some point. The opportunity is here now and I want to take it, but at the same time I don’t.

I’m hoping this is all just a severe case of winter blues and hating the dark. I’m on my swim teaching course next week and each day it is getting lighter so I’m hopeful in a couple of weeks time I’ll be back on form and set on my goals.

Everyone must hit the wall or the sticky lake of mud that slows you down but doesn’t knock you off your feet. It’s frustrating more than anything.

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