I have mentioned I had gone back to counselling as things felt like they were falling apart and I was not coping well with anything.
At first I thought it was a step backwards, but now I realise it was brave to acknowledge I needed help again and ask for it. It wasn’t easy to accept, but acceptance is hard with anything you aren’t particularly happy about. I am currently accepting that I may need to ask for help every now and then from professionals, rather than friends or family, in order to gain some perspective. I’m okay with this. I ask for help to cut my hair, to swim better, to make sure my teeth are all good and when I have pain. I don’t deal with everything a long as I am not an expert on those things. I don’t understand how the mind works, so I need to ask for help. I think its good I’m also curious and interested as I do read up on things I get talking about with them – this time is transitional analysis 🙂
I have also started a mindfulness course and doing some more reading about that through Headspace. I finding the breathing meditations very relaxing and calming. Body scanning not so much – in fact on Monday I was tense and uncomfortable for the whole 15 minutes we did that exercise. I like Headspace though as it fits in with my life. I have done the free Take 10 exercise series a couple of time. I just find I don’t keep it up. This is something I would like to change, so I am going to give it a go at different times of the day to see what works best as right before bed is not working. I am thinking of lunchtimes.
I really wanted to get across in this post that I am okay. I struggle from time to time, but I am strong enough to ask for help and take it.
I hope I can show people that it is okay not to be okay and that asking for help is not weakness, it is the bravest thing you can do for yourself!